


Not Hatred, Just Bruised Souls

by orphan_account



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, M/M, POV Alternating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-02 17:34:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10949409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sometimes, a person can end up hating someone they would have otherwise loved due to the scars that have embedded themselves on a person's soul. Years of suppressing the inner parts of a person, such as sexuality, can have someone act like a complete asshole to someone they find attractive in hopes of saving themselves from their own sexuality. A bullied person can feel guilty over the anger of someone else because they know how it is to have parents that despise parts of who you are.Sometimes, just sometimes, those scars can bring together the people they caused to hate each other.





	1. Chapter 1

Hartley wasn't a high school bully. He had suffered at the hands of quite enough of them at school, hearing those who questioned his intelligence and pushed him around like he was nothing but a toy. It had gotten even worse once his 'dirty little secret' was figured out by some upperclassmen. Slurs and lies were flung back and forth with such an intensity that the young genius almost thought this was a verbal game of dodgeball. It could have been, admittedly, if didgeball allowed for only one person on a team.

Even when jealous and angry, Hartley knew when the line that separated his behavior from being 'antagonistic' to straight out 'bully'. He never crossed it, even though it was tempting to do so whenever he was looked down upon. The words would rise out of his throat like a tsunami and slam against his teeth as he fought to keep his mouth closed. No matter how much he wanted to put the other people he ws forced to be around in their place, he held his tongue as best he could.

S.T.A.R. Labs gave him everything he had ever dreamed of, all in one place. His relationship with his family was tense, to say the least, at the time he was hired. Nothing he could say or do ever felt up to par with the expectations of his father, not to mention those of his mother. They had begun to suspect something was odd about him when he refused to bring home a female date to a banquet, even when told that it was mandatory. His mother was getting close to figuring it all out and it was everything the labs just from that episode, but he persevered. The cold anger that lived inside his home faded away the second he entered the labs. Everything there was full of bright cheer and hope. There was even a mentor, there, who accepted his intelligence and his potential with open arms. Although his relationship with most of his other coworkers was strained, he could handle absolutely everything that came into his path. Work at the labs gave him a safe place where his father's gaze an his mother's sharp words could not reach him. Even the troubling aspect of his sexuality was not an issue there. Until, one day, it was.

That morning had started like every morning and there had been nothing to expect. A new worker had been mentioned once or twice by Dr. Wells, so he knew to expect a new face (although he didn't think any technological engineer needed anywhere near as much praise as his Dr. Wells gave this newcomer). What he did not expect was a bright smile and contagious laugh, bright eyes and beautiful lips, and a wit that put nearly everyone else in the room to shame. I any man in the entire world fit the bill for him, save for the clothing choices, it had been the unsuspecting figure of Cisco Ramon. Before he had even known what was happening, his heart grew cold with the panic of his parents finally piecing together what he was just by Cisco's presence. They would't even have to know who the man was, he was certain they'd figure it out somehow. It had been protection, he told himself, because otherwise he would get hurt.

Before Hartley even knew what had happened, he had flung insults to the man about everything from his clothes (which were still not suited for the workplace,though that didn't make it right) to his choice in music to hisability to complete the job he as hired for. Every time the beautiful man dared to talk well of a girl, anger boiled in his guts from the lust and hidden crush he held within and livid words would begin to tumble out. It wasn't very long until Cisco's sex life was on the table for insults and even Dr. Wells had to tell him to stand down. He wasn't a bully, he told himself again. He wasn't a bully, because these words protected him from everything that could happen to him.

Life continued that way, with him insulting Cisco and the engineer firing back without so much as a falter in his step, for so long into the project that no one was even sure if the bickering would ever stop. Even Ronnie, ever the optimist, had given up on Hartley backing down or Cisco running out of things to say. Some other workers, like a new girl called Angie that Cisco had once fancied, once said that the pair got nothing out of each other but stress relief. It was a ridiculous notion, especially because Hartley had never argued with Cisco just to 'relieve stress'. It was increasingly false when one realized that it was Cisco's comment that had Hartley checking and triple checking the numbers in case there was a possibility of something going wrong.

"I don't know what I'm looking at," he had said that day. "It almost looks like the weather could affect something in the accelerator when it goes off. I know it sounds weird, but that's what I think I see." He had said it to Caitlin, who brushed it off and told Cisco that everything would surely be fine. Hartley had not even been in the conversation, yet he felt the need to see whether or not Cisco had been right, even if he could never say that to the man's face as of then.

It had been long nights at the labs, triple checking his numbers then checking them one more time to see if they rang true yet again. Hartley had to hand it to his almost-muse. When it came to the technology he helped build, he was almost always right. It was no wonder why his Doctor Wells liked him. Although, it was a wonder why Dr. Wells had not picked up on this error before. He had overseen everything with a watchful eye. He seemed to know things no one else could ever know, for the pure reason of him being Harrison Wells. It was nearly impossible that the man would not have figured out the error almost immediately.

Admittedly, that should have been his cue. He had gone down to check, just in case, only to be cornered by Dr. Wells. He knew immediately that he was in deep trouble. He had known at that exact moment that everything he had ever worked for was going to be flushed down the drain, by a man he had trusted with his life and his pride. For some reason, even in that moment, all that had been on his thoughts was Cisco. He had not even dwelled on the idea of confessing that Cisco had been the one to point it out first. In fact, he was innately appalled at the idea. No, his thoughts were on whether or not Cisco's smile would be a bit dimmer, if his laugh would be a bit quieter, if his optimism would be a little more bleak, if something did go wrong with the particle accelerator. He had known, at that moment, that he had to do something to make it all right. He could not spill the beans to the press yet, if he wanted any sort of future, but he knew he was going to do something. Whatever it was, however, was lost to him as of that moment.

All he knew then was that something had to be done, even if it was just for a Spanish-speaking engineer whose wit hid too much self-depreciation from view and whose conversations never strayed to the family he presumably had. He wasn't really a buly, Hartley decided then. He was just messed up and in love.


	2. Chapter 2

Cisco swears he had never wondered exactly why Hartley had been such a dick to him since the first day he had walked in the door. It didn't haunt him as he walked out of work each day, nor did it niggle at him when he first woke up in the morning. he certainly never made flattering comments about a girl just to see Hartley's nose turn up and to hear the barrage of disgusted remarks fly out of his mouth at the words. he would tell himself that he wasn't looking for it when Hartley looked over another male member of the labs and that the queasy feeling in his stomach was just too much candy. Hartley Rathaway was a dick, after all, and gave no fucks what anyone else thought about him. There was nothing more to him than that. Except, of course, everything.

He had seen Hartley in the room on the day that he had made the comment to Caitlin, who had just happened to be passing by when at the time. He had tried to mention what he had seen to another one of the engineers, but all of them said that they had tested and everything was fine. He had to make sure, he knew, but without any of the bigwigs noticing. Even though he loved it at S.T.A.R. Labs, always had, he knew that discretion was sometimes needed in order to stay safe in this place. The only one would could have checked his findings with was the one man he would never start a conversation with willingly: Hartley Rathaway, because the universe hated him. Of course, if the dick just happened to hear him say something to a friend about his findings, then it wasn't his fault if th other man double-checked his findings. After all, it's only being a good scientists. He was completely uninvolved. Until he wasn't.

It was impossible for him not to notice the way Hartley had changed over the course of a week. He was always on some sort of computer, muttering to himself with glazed eyes and a half-eaten bite to eat still held in his hand. On the third day, Hartley "Neat and Clean to the Point of Perfection" Rathaway had even forgotten his tie. It was his favorite tie as well,although it wasn't like Cisco was keeping track of the kinds of ties that his nemesis liked. Whatever it was that the other was finding, it was bad. He could almost feel his faith wavering in the project. However, he knew that the project was going to end up just fine. Dr. Wells had said so, after all, and he had to be right. If he wasn't right about everything, then who on God's green earth could he even depend on anymore?

With that in mind, Cisco said nothing as the week progressed and the stress engraved itself into the very marrow of Hartley's bones. He ha said nothing, in the hopes that it would all be fine. If he had found something wrong with the accelerator, Hartley would have told Dr. Wells. Dr. Wells would take care of everything. He kept his silence until the end of the week, when Hartley suddenly stopped showing up to the labs and business started to progress even faster than normal. He had gone early into work that morning only to find Hartley's desk empty and everything he had ever worked on moved faraway. he had known right then that something bad was going to happen to Hartley, or had already happened. He hadn't pegged Dr. Wells as the type to kill someone just for getting in his way or challenging his view. However, it was clear to Cisco he did not exactly know everything about his employer. He may not have known exactly what happened to Hartley (besides Dr. Wells' cryptic statement of 'He was fired for his own good'), but there were some things he did know: One, he had to watch Dr. Wells to see what exactly he's up to, especially after the particle accelerator's big debut; and two, whatever happened to Hartley was completely his fault.

Those thoughts were on his mind every single day as he went home, accompanied by thoughts of what exactly caused Hartley's dickish behavior in the first place. For a good week the young engineer was haunted by the thoughts from work and shadowed by the presence of the absence of his family, which was likely more potent than their actual presence. Those thoughts were still on his mind four days before the accelerator's dig debut, when a green envelope with no return address nor name landed in his mailbox. The contents, Cisco soon found, proved to be even more mysterious than its sender.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote both chapters in one go. It's the most productive in writing I've been since I wrote six chapters of a Hetalia fanfic to cause misery to my friend.  
> I actually am super insecure about Cisco's part. There's so much more that I wanted to say, but I didn't have the flow nor words to say it. Mr. Ramon decided that enough was enough, I guess.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a idea that I've been kicking around in my head for a while. I usually am more of a Harrisco fan, and don't read much else besides that except for ColdFlash. However, I saw a cool Hartley/Cisco video a while back and wondered what it would be like.  
> I haven't written anything in a long time, so please understand that I'm rusty and am writing on a keyboard that likes to skip letters. I'm usually way more descriptive in my writing, I'm just trying something different.  
> If you guys want to see any more of this story, please comment below. I only have two chapters written right now and I'll leave it at that unless someone wants me to write more.


End file.
